Why we speak up when Hollywood whitewashes our favorite characters of color
Just like so many other longtime comic book fans, I was excited to hear about the upcoming Hellboy reboot. What I didn’t expect was for the movie to cause a...
WaterCoolerConvos At the intersections of Blackness, culture, and adulting.
White “allies” and speaking the words of racial violence in the United States
If white folx can’t be “allies” to their Black co-congregants in church, then I’m not sure there’s any place white allyship can actualy exist. Let me explain. On a recent...
If Colin Kaepernick is for Black lives, he won’t go back to the NFL
Too often, in our hasty gestures of doling out ally and wokeness credits, we fail to turn a critical lens to the ways that performative activism rarely metes out actual...
For some of us, it’s time to enter a Year of ‘No’
I recently purchased Shonda Rhimes’ Year of Yes: How to Dance It Out, Stand In the Sun and Be Your Own Person for my partner. It wasn’t until I read the...
I was most comfortable with my identity when I was anti-Black
“That’s so ghetto,” he said to another student in my classroom. The tall, attractive Black 15-year-old was commenting on how he thought that Black women who speak loudly in public...
It is impossible to love Black women and R-Kelly at the same time
Moving to Chicago in 2014 taught me a number of things. It taught me what real cold felt like. It taught me how pizza should taste. And it also taught...
How we use the term ‘hater’ to avoid reflection and self-improvement
One of the greatest R&B lines ever delivered is “don’t need no hateration, holleration, in this dancerie.” The Queen of R&B, Mary J. Blige gave us that one in...
On ‘4:44’, maleness, and the performance of the public apology
Recently, rapper Jay-Z released his thirteenth solo album 4:44. The album details his infidelity to his wife, mother of his three children, and perhaps the biggest superstar in the world, Beyoncé....
Three reasons why a romantic relationship won’t fix you
I have achieved the rare feat of being in a committed relationship for nearly fifteen years. I have been married for over a decade and have three kids. I’m still...
The loneliness of the Black Millennial Mother
“It’s not my fault you’re pregnant,” a male coworker said to me when I raised an issue with how infrequently people would give up their seats on our company...
Stop Giving Yourself Away: On Millennials, Depression, and Personal Growth
I give myself away all the time. To my children. To my partner. To mom. To my friends. To my job. My boss. My peers. My couch. My studies. My...
The Paradox and Power of the Black Professional Ball Player
Professional athletics have long been riddled with controversy and scandal. But, there are some particularities facing Black professional athletes in the NFL and the NBA today that must be called...
I’m a Black, Millennial, Academic, Mom. Yes, it is harder than you think.
I was born in 1984. While I wasn’t really allowed to watch popular television shows for almost a decade, I vividly remember seeing TLC’s “What About Your Friends” video on...
Four Signs That You Might Subscribe to the Politics of Respectability
One of the most irritating byproducts of this new era of being “woke” is the increased numbers of people who read one Martin Luther King, Jr speech or saw one...
Anxiety, Death and The Moments When ‘This Is Us’ Gets It Completely Right
A couple of weeks ago, I wrote a conflicted piece about NBC’s “This Is Us.” Befuddled by the dissonance I experienced between the show’s resounding praise and my own thoughts...
Why saying ‘the Oscars are about the white gaze’ misses the point
I have long been critical of national awards shows. I have also long been critical of the white gaze. I learned in my twenties that neither of them were for...
